Grizzly Bear, 1 - Man with Much Grizzly Love, 0

Then, something with the weight of a sledgehammer shatters this dream back into harsh reality. Sometimes my pop culture addiction reels me back in - "Well, if I leave now, I'll never know how Jack Bauer finds those terrorists with that nerve gas," or "I was really looking forward to playing Halo 3 when that comes out and buying an Xbox 360 eventually." Other times I think about the family and friends I'd leave behind, and my 2 cats: "Who will scoop up their turds and saturated pee/litter clumps?"
This time, the sledgehammer was a documentary that made me think, "what the hell was I thinking! It's friggin' suicide out in them thar hills! A bunch of wild animals are just waiting to bite a chunk out of my Asian ass and stockpile my nuts for winter! F-that!"

The most fascinating thing about this film was that most of the story is told by Tim himself, through the hours and hours of footage he shot with his camcorder. From this unique first person narrative, you really get inside this guy's head, and you start to understand why would anyone want to get this close to these awesome but feral beasts, knowing at any moment, you're one grizzly bitch slap away from getting your head ripped clean off your shoulders and sent floating down a cold Alaskan stream...'salmon food' if you will.
Watching this film reminded me of my solo backpacking trip I took to the Adirondacks, September 2003. On the third night of a five night trip, sleeping in a lean-to with three other hikers, I heard the sound of branches crackling and some 'thing' huffing, like someone trying to blow a booger out of his nose by putting one finger against one nostril and blowing really hard, except much, much more frightening. We all sat up, leaned out of our lean-to toward where the sound was coming from, and saw two glowing orbs looking right at us, 30 ft. away. Two hikers aimed their flashlights on the orbs as I ran to get my Leatherman and hiking poles (at the time I thought it was a good idea).

That bitch cut my trip short two days.
I haven't been backpacking since, but I plan to this spring... unless that's when Halo 3 comes out.
1 Comments:
Just think, someone could have been scooping you out of grizzly turds as you do your cats. Oh, the irony....
1:50 PM
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